Transformers: Age of Extinction is nearly three %$^&%!!# hours, and they're brain-freezing.
Well before it finished I was numb from its bludgeoning excess.
This is as excruciating a movie as is likely to be experienced by anyone, anywhere.
The Transformers are brilliant, brave, world-conquering space travelers. Time to morph into something entertaining.
There's more product-placement in this movie than I can remember in ... ever. Even Dr. Dre gets a Beats shoutout-like he needs the money.
The movie is nonsense, bound together with cars and girls and robot MMA, which is, of course, what its audience joyously demands, and so the franchise endures, intensifying its ear-splitting ballet of incoherence.
If you love furious spectacle overwhelming two-dimensional characters, plot holes and inconsistencies, bloat and overall stupidity, 'Transformers: Age of Extinction' might be right up your alley. (Full Content Review for Parents also Available)
Michael Bay's skill as a director has grown more incompetent as his career goes on, putting him in the same league as M. Night Shyamalan, Roland Emmerich and the guy who made Battlefield Earth.
Transformers: Age of Extinction is an overlong, annoying, heartless piece of explosion porn that only feeds Michael Bay's ego.
Not in quite some time have I witnessed such an atrocity of moviemaking that manages to deliver even worse acting and story than the previous bad films.
(The) bewildering first act is Shakespearean compared to an extended mid-section which may represent the worst second act in scriptwriting history.
It is one of the most relentless movies I have ever seen. It just refuses to end.
Seriously, the next movie should just be called "Transformers: Hammer to the Skull."
The final confrontation alone lasts close to an hour, and at some point, you may find yourself simply in a daze, unable to absorb any further action into your brain.
One thing you have to give Bay credit for: He has a knack for bringing A-list talent down to his level.
Like a nuclear arsenal launched by an insane despot, Michael Bay's "Transformers: Age of Extinction" aims for a million different targets and incinerates them beyond recognition.
In striving for nothing but "more"-more explosions, more robot slo-mo scenes, more up-shorts shots of 19-year-old girls-the movie becomes devoid of anything.
Michael Bay has done the impossible. With Transformers: Age of Extinction, the start of a - everyone duck! - second trilogy in his metalhead franchise, the Bay-man has made the worst and most worthless Transformers movie yet.
Transformers: Age of Extinction isn't a bad movie; it's the worst possible product of a big Hollywood system drunk on a cocktail of fermented nostalgia and rancid profiteering while driving moviegoing into the ground.
Sitting through Transformers: Age of Extinction is like binge-watching the death of the human spirit.
Transform your money into a ticket to something else.
You will feel dumber for having sat through it.
How dare you Michael Bay? How dare you?
Fucking great
