The Definitive Thread of Utter Nonsense

[BrautFan]

I apologize for taking a mental dump in the introduction area. I am rude and unrefined. I'm a simple person with simple needs. All of this is true.

I did, however, want to make a special place where you can utter whatever sort of ridiculous idea that you feel is appropriate (that would clearly be inappropriate in any other location).

I will start with this: There are two types of "little engines." There is the "little engine that could" and the little engine that "just fucking might... if it dares." This second rendition is clearly for the older child. It is a story of dogged persistence toward ridiculous life goals and various types of higher education with no regard to the fact that it requires a huge ass student loan debt mountain to surpass.

[HFX]

Are you on drugs.

[Georgerv]

Balls! Discuss.

[BrautFan]

For the record, I "cheek" my medicine when they try to administer it daily. I also like coffee; but it makes me nervous when I drink it. *Grunt*

I am Sling Blade. Some people call it a Kaiser Blade. (I call it a sling blade).

[BrautFan]

Mmmmmhmmmmm..

[BrautFan]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O6WhYjjyEMA

[prophet]

Cool gimmick.

[BrautFan]

"What did you do to take care of 'YOUR' sin problem?"

Answer: "The Bible says two men ought not lay together." "You reckon you could make me sum mustardn' biscuits?" "I like them french fried potaters."

Excuse me while I prepare myself for my trip southward. I have been a problem to the people of the Midwest for long enough. Time now to vacation and get back in sync with my people.

[BrautFan]

This is IT. I swear I'm going to work in a short while. But I must post this before I go. I got a solid ab workout laughing at this... oh my GOD: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLuhOhkUykM

[The Legend]

Are you @Chewy younger, nuttier brother?

[BrautFan]

Ah, point proven. See everybody, I'm just "one of the guys."

I'm gonna get them thar student's done some learnin' this smornin'. Right here after I get done with my mustardn' biscuit combo.

[Twister]

Okay.

[Settee]

Im way too tired to even try to figure out whats going on here...

[Locke]

Glad to see I'm not the only one thinking "What the holy fuck is this" and such.

[BrautFan]

You know what really turns me on? A serious case of "dumb face." I bet all you guys are wearing that vacant, uninformed gaze... Ah, yes.

Physician: "I'm afraid to inform you... that you have chronic "dumb face." This condition will wax and wane during your life; but eventually, you will see overall decline. I recommend you post on a forum for the rest of your life, and such, and not let your face be seen."

[Str8Shooter]

[BrautFan]

Yes, God, thank you! Thanks for lightening up the mood. Yes, I am a black man who is one minute jovial and then about to "whoop" your ass the next.

[BrautFan]

My diagnosis is really "Irish ancestry." This is an unfortunate side effect. Ever seen an Irish person be light and jolly and then about to seriously rip someone's head off in a matter of moments? It is quite unbecoming. Things get ugly and deteriorate quicker than you might expect. Euros: Feel free to weigh in. I might just be an uninformed rube, after all.

[PorkChop]

[BrautFan]

I'm not being challenged enough. This is a bit dissatisfying! I suppose I could go to a relative's house and have a real Irish hoedown (Texas style)... maybe that would entertain me.