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5 Clever Movie Schemes You Didn't Realize Were Stupid

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5 Clever Movie Schemes You Didn't Realize Were Stupid

Postby Hanley! » Nov 05, '13, 6:19 pm

It's been a while, but I had another article published on Cracked.com earlier on today. Give it a read if you're interested. And if you're so inclined, like it and share it and all that other good stuff because I like money. :P

http://www.cracked.com/article_20659_5-clever-movie-schemes-you-didnt-realize-were-stupid.html#ixzz2jouCMXuc
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Re: 5 Clever Movie Schemes You Didn't Realize Were Stupid

Postby SlightlyJames » Nov 05, '13, 6:49 pm

I heard that they had actually considered approaching Connery to be Kincade in the movie but decided it would be too distracting. I'd have loved it :lol
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Re: 5 Clever Movie Schemes You Didn't Realize Were Stupid

Postby prophet » Nov 05, '13, 7:48 pm

Great article mate. You had me going 'Shit yeah that's right' every two seconds. The Bond one was a worthy number 1 - everything about that bit in the film makes no fucking sense when you think about it. The Star Trek one is true in regards to how much they dicked about trying to catch one guy when they had 72 on the actual ship when Kirk was :lol

Although to be fair the capturing of Khan was a necessity anyway so it made sense for Spock to go after him, though perhaps not for the sole reason of saving Kirk. I'll be sure to spread it around dude!
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Re: 5 Clever Movie Schemes You Didn't Realize Were Stupid

Postby PorkChop » Nov 05, '13, 8:25 pm

Great article, and I also agree the Skyfall ending is the rightful #1. I hated that film, mainly for such a ridiculously shit ending.
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Re: 5 Clever Movie Schemes You Didn't Realize Were Stupid

Postby Everlong » Nov 05, '13, 11:05 pm

On the one hand, I want to read this because you wrote it.

On the other hand, I don't want to read it because you wrote it and it'll probably be about you trashing a bunch of movies I really love, which I can get from any one of our MSN/skype conversations :lol
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Re: 5 Clever Movie Schemes You Didn't Realize Were Stupid

Postby Viazon » Nov 06, '13, 5:26 am

I liked Django Unchained but I did feel that the plan to get his wife back was way too complicated.
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Re: 5 Clever Movie Schemes You Didn't Realize Were Stupid

Postby Headlesspete » Nov 06, '13, 10:39 am

" All would be well, except Marty buys a sports almanac from a bizarre future where people still buy books instead of just using Wikipedia." - Brilliant.

Great read dude. The POC one really stood out as being awful. Hell, the simple alliances of each character made no sense half way into the 2nd film, and it only got worse from there!
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Re: 5 Clever Movie Schemes You Didn't Realize Were Stupid

Postby Hanley! » Nov 06, '13, 11:54 am

reyflyinfury619 wrote:On the one hand, I want to read this because you wrote it.

On the other hand, I don't want to read it because you wrote it and it'll probably be about you trashing a bunch of movies I really love, which I can get from any one of our MSN/skype conversations :lol


Well that is our dynamic. :lol

In all seriousness, I didn't even hate any of these movies. Well except Pirates of the Caribbean; with the exception of the first movie that whole franchise is crap. But the other ones I found at least somewhat enjoyable. But I still enjoy finding plot holes in these films and getting paid for it. :P
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Re: 5 Clever Movie Schemes You Didn't Realize Were Stupid

Postby Settee » Nov 10, '13, 10:37 pm

SlightlyJames wrote:I heard that they had actually considered approaching Connery to be Kincade in the movie but decided it would be too distracting. I'd have loved it :lol


That would have been great to see, but I do think it would have taken the spot light off of Craig.
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Re: 5 Clever Movie Schemes You Didn't Realize Were Stupid

Postby UTK » Nov 11, '13, 11:33 am

Headlesspete wrote:"All would be well, except Marty buys a sports almanac from a bizarre future where people still buy books instead of just using Wikipedia." - Brilliant.
!


But didn't he buy the almanac from an antique store, which would make sense?
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Re: 5 Clever Movie Schemes You Didn't Realize Were Stupid

Postby Hanley! » Nov 11, '13, 2:39 pm

^^ Don't ask me, Pirates and Back to the Future were written by the other guy. :P But it's just a throwaway joke in any case, not pivotal to the entry as a whole.
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Re: 5 Clever Movie Schemes You Didn't Realize Were Stupid

Postby Kyle » Nov 13, '13, 1:15 pm

Awesome article, Steve. A++
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Re: 5 Clever Movie Schemes You Didn't Realize Were Stupid

Postby Everlong » Nov 14, '13, 12:21 pm

I didn't read the Django or BTTF2 parts because I haven't seen those movies, but I mostly liked the other stuff. However, in regard to your Star Trek point, don't you think they'd want to do everything they could to avoid waking up Khan's crew and getting blood from them after all of the trouble they had with Khan himself? They had Khan readily available, so it makes more sense to use his blood than the others.

Also, wasn't the whole point of Khan's character that he was the leader of the others because he was superior to all of them in terms of his genetic engineering? It's hard to say whether or not the blood of the other crew members would have even had the same effect.

I realize that it's kind of a silly scenario regardless of how you twist it, but come on, it's Star Trek, there's always an element of silliness :P
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Re: 5 Clever Movie Schemes You Didn't Realize Were Stupid

Postby PorkChop » Nov 14, '13, 12:30 pm

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Re: 5 Clever Movie Schemes You Didn't Realize Were Stupid

Postby Hanley! » Nov 15, '13, 5:33 pm

Everlong wrote:I didn't read the Django or BTTF2 parts because I haven't seen those movies, but I mostly liked the other stuff. However, in regard to your Star Trek point, don't you think they'd want to do everything they could to avoid waking up Khan's crew and getting blood from them after all of the trouble they had with Khan himself? They had Khan readily available, so it makes more sense to use his blood than the others.

Also, wasn't the whole point of Khan's character that he was the leader of the others because he was superior to all of them in terms of his genetic engineering? It's hard to say whether or not the blood of the other crew members would have even had the same effect.

I realize that it's kind of a silly scenario regardless of how you twist it, but come on, it's Star Trek, there's always an element of silliness :P


No, Khan was definitely not superior to the others - the movie made it clear that they were all engineered in the same way. There were some lines like "Imagine having to deal with this many guys as powerful as Khan."

I've heard the other defense a few times in response to the article, but first of all with all the technology they have in that universe you think they don't have a way to get a little blood out of someone without releasing them from stasis? Couldn't like, a needle do that? Also Kirk was put into one of the tubes in order to preserve his brain function while they waited for Spock to bring back Khan, so they must have taken someone out anyway.
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